I am an Only Daughter's Only Daughter's Only Daughter

Playroom Remodel Part 5 - Framed!

I've been a little behind this week on posting but I have good excuses!  Or excuses anyway, no these are good really.

We celebrated Only Husband's 46th Birthday on Tuesday.
Only Husband and one of my of my hero's husband share a love of the Moon Pie.
For his birthday cake he and Only Daughter shared a banana pie heated in the microwave.

Only Mother's birthday was the 29th but we have to wait for her to get home to have her celebration.  Happy Birthday Mom!!

Wednesday night was AWANA and Thursday night was just stuff.

Today, Only Daughter received the "Sensational Citizen" award for her 1st grade class.
We are so proud.

Finally Friday night and Only Husband got the laundry closet and the storage area framed in.

Professional drywall guys will be here at 9 am tomorrow morning to hang the sheetrock and tape and bed everything.  Oh my goodness, we could actually be painting next week!!  I'd better be deciding on a color!  I think I have it narrowed down to what I want.  Color theme and accessory details coming next.

Spoiled but not Rotten

Antique Mommy wrote a post today about her Only and how hard it can be not to let an Only become spoiled. It was sweet, touching story that showed how hard it can be and proved beyond a doubt that her Only is anything but rotten.

I have a perspective on this that may be a little different as I am an Only myself.  Onlies may appear spoiled to outsiders looking in.  Onlies get ALL the toys, ALL the time, ALL the attention and ALL the love.  But parents of Onlies know, who else is going to get it?  They are our Only Child.  Do we withhold our love or are attention or our time because we don't want them to have too much?  We all have the same amount of love, time, attention and things to give, we just have to figure out how to spread it around depending on how many we have to give it to.

My Only Mother and Only Daddy never had to worry about who was going to attend which kid's game or recital or who was going to get held first or who got new clothes on a tight budget and who got hand-me downs.  I played softball for 10 years and Only Mother never missed a single game.  The one time Only Daddy did was because his plane was delayed in Denver and he couldn't get a flight.  I certainly didn't get everything I wanted but I did get a lot.  I got more allowance than most of my friends but then I was the Only one to do the chores so I did more around the house. Only Mother instilled in me a sense of appreciation for what I had.

 From an early age I tried (not always successfully) to resist buying Only Daughter every little thing she asked for.  It's hard because my heart tells me it's not the "thing", it's the joy in her eyes and the smile on her face when she gets something she really wants.  But my head helps me remember that the joy and happiness won't mean as much if she comes to expect it all the time. 

It's gotten easier as she's gotten older.  I think when she was little a lot of the "things" where for me.  I was new at the whole being-loved-by-somebody-so-unconditionally thing and I had struggled so hard to have her and had given up hope that I would ever have a child.  Having someone all my own that I could delight so much by giving her a simple little toy was such a thrill!  Now I can talk it out with her, teach her that sometimes you don't get it just because you want it.  I try to teach her the value of a reward for hard work or the good feeling that comes from saving up for something special.

Sure Onlies have some advantages but we can still come out not-rotten if our Parents do it right.  It's my hope and my prayer that Only Daddy and I are doing it right.

Let the Grandparents do the spoiling, we have enough to do just getting them dressed and to school on time!

The Cast of Onlies

I thought I would take a moment to introduce the Cast of Onlies in my life as I will be telling stories about them.  Hopefully some of them will never, ever know....

Only Husband - Todd:  45, roofer, handy man, modern day cowboy, lover of all things racing (NASCAR, dirt track, etc.), hunter, fisherman, would live on the farm if I could be that far away from Wal-Mart.  Never owned a suit and I think he's perfect.

Only Daughter - Brystol:  6, girly girl, brilliant reader, preaches the Gospel like nobody's business, dancer, gymnast, wants to be a vet when she grows up.  She has the attitude of a teen but still needs Mama to hold her.

Only Mother and Only Daddy - my parents:  Not Ward and June, more like Fred and Ethel.  They fuss a lot but if they didn't that's when we would worry about them.  They travel the country selling jelly and salsa.  My friends always said I had the coolest parents.

Only MeMe and Only BoBo - Todd's parents: That's what everyone, related or not calls them.  Well not the "only" part of course.  Only Niece named them that when she was little and that is how they are know world wide.  They will be married 50 years this August. 

Only Sister and Only Brother-In-Law - Todd's sister and her husband:  They don't live far but we don't see them often enough.

Only Niece - Only Sister's daughter:  She just had a baby!

JD - Best Friend:  Can't call her "Only" cause that would seem like she's my only friend and I really do have others.  Really.

JB - Best Friends Only Daughter:  2 yrs younger than my only.  We've told them they'd better get along because they have no choice but to be best friends just like their mamas.

That's mostly everyone.  I'll introduce a few more along the way.  Now I must fight the Friday-After-Lunch-Snooze-Blues that come our office at about this time every week.  You can find me in my office either productively working or trying desperately to not let my head slam the desk as I dozzzzzzzzzz

We have a new baby....

Only Husband's Only Niece had a baby yesterday.  Kelton Daron ____ was born at 11:11am April 9th.  He wasn't due until May 2 but he's doing great.  He weighs 6lbs 3 oz and is 19" long.  He has a full head of fuzzy  black hair and a perfect little face.  This makes him the Only Great-Grand Baby.

Only Daughter is convinced this baby was born for her use only.  This will be the closest she'll ever get to having a sibling and she's made it clear that she is in charge of him.  I'm waiting for them to get home to see if the jealousy monster will make a visit.  She may not be so fond of this baby when her MeMe is holding him instead of her.

Only Niece was 24 when Only Daughter was born so Only Daughter has ruled the roost for 6 years.  This is going to be fun....

I think I'll explain the "only daughter" thing...

(Posted on my original blog 2 yrs ago but nobody ever saw it.)

My maternal grandmother, Mae Isabel Walker Raper, was the the only daughter of six kids.  My mother is the only daughter of 3 kids.  I am the only daughter and the only kid.  Now I have a daughter and she will also be an only so the tradition continues.

My great-uncle Ernest, one of "Ma's" brothers, coined the phrase "Only daughter's, only daughter's, only daughter".  He owned a laundry mat in the late 60's and would carry me around in one enormous hand telling me I was special because I was an Only Daughter.

Ma was born in June of 1907 in Indian Territory, an area that later became the State of Oklahoma.  She was the youngest of the six siblings.  She graduated high school and then went on to graduate from Oklahoma A&M College (now OK State) with a degree in Home Economics in 1930.  This was a very unusual feat for women in those days and great source of pride for our family.

She married Clarence Raper in June of 1930.  They set up a dairy farm on her (yes! her!) land along the South Canadian river on the Pottawatomie/Seminole county line. Together they built a thriving dairy and farm, had 2 sons and a daughter.  Tragically the daughter was lost in a home fire when she was 4 yrs old.  Six years later they had my Mother and she became an only daughter.

 

Ma was 60 when I was born but she never seemed old. She died of leukemia when she was 74.  She played with us (I have 5 cousins who are like sisters and brothers to me), she took the oldest cousin - the rest of us in tow - cruisin' main street.  She let us "swim" in a ditch on the farm when our dads had said no.  She joined us for tea parties in the cellar.  She taught us how to sew and to crochet and to cook.  She taught us that God loves us and Christ died on the cross for us.  She taught us beauty and manners and a deep respect for our heritage.  She taught us how to take little bits of nothing and make them into the wonderful somethings.  And, I guess the most important lesson she taught us was how to be strong and carry on once she was gone.

Oh how I miss her.